On Frustration

We all know how annoying those practices are where we just can't seem to land anything, center any spin, or hold any spiral. It's frustrating to pop jumps, fall out of spins and trip in a footwork sequence but if you can't get control of your frustrations they will eventually take over your skating. I'm speaking from personal experience because I have a problem with frustration myself. It used to be much worse but I am still my own worst enemy when it comes to bad days. It's what my coach calls a vicious cycle. A few bad jumps and I begin to get annoyed. The more annoyed I get the less I focus. The less I focus the fewer good jumps. Fewer good jumps equals more frustration and so on. Over the years I've developed a few methods to dealing with my frustrations but like anxiety, there isn't a magic button you can press that makes it all go away. You have to believe in yourself, and for most people, myself included, that is the most difficult part. Here are some different methods to dealing with frustrations.

1. Take a break. Step back from your skating for a minute and breathe. Whether it's just a sip from your water bottle or whether it's sitting down for a few minutes, or deciding to sit out a session, a little rest might help you to come back feeling refreshed.

2. Stop being so hard on yourself. Much easier said than done, am I right? But in all seriousness, try to remind yourself why you skate. Your answer should be along the lines of because you love it or because you want to.

3. Do something else. If it's that tricky double axel that's got you tripped up for the day don't spend time obsessing over it. Move on to something else with a clean slate. Take a deep breath and work on something else for awhile, something you know you have mastered.

4. Fake it till you make it. If you are kicking the ice, slamming down hard on landings, smacking the ice, it will only add to your frustrations. If you pretend that you are perfectly calm it will eventually convince you that you are in fact, cool, calm and collected.

5. Bad days happen. Most of the time frustration occurs because we can't do something that is normally easy for us. Remind yourself that if it was easy at one point, it will be easy again. But getting into that vicious cycle won't help. A safe bet is to leave whatever is driving you nuts until the next day. Chances are, it will be back to being good after a good nights rest.

As I said in my On Anxiety post, I'm not a psychiatrist or a professional but I do have a lot of first hand experience dealing with these types of issues. The best I can do is give you the same advice that sometimes works for me and hope it does the same for you. The hardest part about dealing with frustration is that you have to want to not be frustrated. This seems like an obvious statement on a day where you are calm and collected but when frustration takes over, it's a much different story. Just like with nerves, the key is to believe in yourself. Don't be so hard on yourself, you're better than you think. Still, easier said than done, I know. But give it a shot, you might surprise yourself.

Best of Luck!!